How Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

It depends on the type of chicken.

NT Chicken

Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure.

OS/2 Chicken

It crossed the road years ago, but who wants a big, blue, slow chicken?

Windows 95 Chicken

You see differently colored feathers while it crosses, but cook it and it still tastes like ... chicken.

Microsoft Chicken

It's already on both sides of the road. And it just bought the road.

Amiga Chicken

There are multiple chickens, crossing many roads at the same time, but they were, unfortunately, marketed as frogs.

OOP Chicken

It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

Assembler Chicken

First it builds the road ...

C Chicken

It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken

The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you'd simply refer to him on the other side.

VB Chicken

USHighways!TheRoad.cross(aChicken)

Delphi Chicken

The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Java Chicken

If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, this is a chicklet.)

Web Chicken

Jumps out onto the road, turns right and just keeps on running.

Gopher Chicken

Tried to run but got flattened by the Web chicken.

Newton Chicken

Can't cluck, can't fly and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket!

Cray Chicken

Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side fully cooked.

Quantum Logic Chicken

The chicken is distributed probabilistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

Lotus Chicken

Don't you dare try to cross the road the same way we do!

Macintosh Chicken

No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road; so there's no way to tell it to.

COBOL Chicken

0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES
THEN
PERFORM 0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Note: I'm not the author, these tidbits were all forwarded to me via email. Where I know the author, it is given.
The From: header may be the author, or it may just be the person who forwarded it to me.
Feel free to contact me to claim authorship.