A Fake Internet Presence,
From: Karin Spaink (kspaink at xs4all.nl)
Subject: ABOI: Gothic pick-up lines
Found this collection, amassed in a period of a few weeks and ditifuly edited by Bob, in alt.gothic. Currently they're working on the logical follow-up: Gothic split-up lines.
From: bob at dcs.qmw.ac.uk (Bob) Subject: Gothic Pick-up lines Date: 2 Apr 1995 18:46:39 GMT
I post this every now and then. I thot I'd do it now....
GOTHIC PICKUP LINES
Edited by BobThese are a bunch of pick-up lines which seem to a be a recurring thread on the alt.gothic news group. I've added commentary as to which worked and how. You're gonna have to match up the commentary to the lines yourself 'cos I'm to lazy to do it now. Sorry. It works fine on the HTML version.
LISTS OF LINES
Erika's top thirteen pick-up linesjade at tatertot.com
Many of these are from non-goth guys. Because they tend to be the most amusing. . .
13) You remind me of my dead ex-girlfriend. 12) Do you think I could borrow that dress/bustier sometime? 11) I found this [lace glove, rosary, etc.] on the floor at the club last night, is it yours? Well, if it's not, I'd like to give it to you anyway. 10) Is that your boyfriend? I think you can do better than that! (some poser from Ottawa with New York City attitude) 9) So, are you a catholic? (non-goth) 8) So, are you a satanist? (goth) 7) So, are you a goth? (neither) 6) How do you get your hair to do that? / Can you cut my hair like that? 5) Oh, yeah, [band name] is really great. . . I have all their rare stuff. You can come over to my place and tape it all if you want. 4) You look a lot like. . .[choose one: Winona Ryder, Siouxsie Sioux, Morticia, Elvira, Robert Smith, Edward Scissorhands] To which you should answer: No, actually, he/she/it looks a lot like me. 3) I keep all of my most important poems and drawings in this little book. And I'd like you to have it because they're mostly about you. (Really cute, lovesick 18 year old goth boy) 2) Greetings... [bows deeply, tips hat]. I'm Bob. And the Drumroll please..... The award for most hilarious attempted pick-up of a goth chyck goes to this frat boy: 1) "Excuse me, miss? Hi, I'm doing a scavenger hunt for my fraternity rush, and one of the things on my list is a umm....weird chick. And if I don't get one soon, they won't let me pledge... So, if you're not busy, could you come with me to the rush party tonight?? I'd really appreciate it." Christa Starr akasha at athena.mit.edu 1."What does net.goth mean? Hey, are you, like, into that computer stuff?" 2."So, come back to my place, and if you don't like it I swear I'll give you a full refund." 3."Hi. My name is ****, and I'm a vampire, but only on alternate Wednesdays." 4.But my favorite of all time had to be when someone walked up to me and started singing the "Creepy Girl" song from Mystery Science Theater 3000.... Arnold Friend spiggy at netcom.com 1.So you're a girl huh? 2.Do you like food? 3.Do you like music? 4.Shhhhhhhhhh...... Don't tell anyone but I'm a vampire. Shhhhhhh.... No really. and I'm 4000 years old. Really. but now I live in the valley with my mom. 5.Hey you! You in the black! 6.Wait...... the cure.. right? 7.yeah I know the singer. 8.I just wanted to tell you I think you dance really well. It's like when you are out there it's like you don't care what anybody thinks. 9.Are you gay? 10.Don't you hate it when people ask you if you are gay! 11.Remember when this club was cool....? you know before everyone I used to hang out with like got jobs or moved out of thier parents house? Some of them have actually worked. Sad, no? Neon Samurai neon.samurai at tde.com 1.Worship me! 2.what lovely eyes you have... I used to have some *just like them*. 3.Aren't you (insert gothic-y singer here)? 4.Didn't I go to your funeral? (for humorous goths only! Many do not like this...) Kerry Smith eliasny at netcom.com Well, not being one to respond enthusiastically to overtly sexual come-ons, but trying to find some common topic of interest, the following "lines" have worked on me. 1."Pardon me, but my corset has come unlaced. Could you tighten it for me?" Footnote: Generally asking a man for any kind of assistance makes him feel needed, and appreciated: the key to any type of relationship 2."Have you heard of this band before?" (at shows, or record stores) 3."Although you seem content, you also seem quite alone over here. Can I interrupt your reverie?" 4."Hi, aren't you [insert any ficticiuos name here]?" Chris mk42+ at andrew.cmu.edu The ones I prefer are the one's women who picked me up would use... 1.Did you know you look just like Clint Ruin (aka Jim Thilwell)? 2.If your cheekbones were any higher they'd need warning lights. 3.I'd like to tie you to a rafter and fuck you up and down. 4.Would you please come home with me and tie me up... 5.And my all time favorite was at this party. I had just shown up and this foot gothic amazon goddess came up to me and said... "You're mine" and walked away. 3 hours later she came up to me and said "Let's go". I didn't get out of her house for four days. I couldn't walk right for another three. It was a good week... John Evans lgas at cs.umd.edu 1."Blow me if I'm wrong, but you wanna fuck me." 2."That's a fabulous black corsett and it goes great with those boots, but they would both look better on the floor next to my bed." 3."Wanna go for a ride in my porsche? It's black..." 4."Are you here alone or am I going to have to kill someone to win your affection?" Voron LANGSDORFJE96%CS36 at cadetmail.usafa.af.mil 1."Say something to scare me." 2."I wanted to get your name before one of us dies." 3."Hi, my name's [insert name], what's yours? (*that* one does wonders.) 4."You're a cadet, right? what the hell are you doing here? I didn't know any of you had lifes...." Joe Brenner doom at kzsu.Stanford.EDU 1."Hey, I'm looking for a second girlfriend. How about you?" 2."Know any places to buy Absinthe around here?" 3."What's your favorite Baudelaire poem?" 4."I bet you don't own a CD player, either." 5."Hey, do you know Joe Radio?" Charles Taylor ctaylor at alioth.cc.nps.navy.mil Here's a few that have worked on me*: 1."Hello" (used on me once or twice with positive results) 2."Didn't I see you here last week?" 3."Want a drink? I brewed it myself." (it was mead, it was an SCA event) 4."You know, I always though you deserved better [than your ex]" (I had just broken up with her best friend\employee,I was sad, depressed, lonely) 5."Do you know how to turn on the lights of a mercury?" (it was a rental, (the car, not the girl :-) )) Steve Benesko steveb at io.org 1.Did you know that you have enough tissue on the inside of your lungs to wallpaper the entire room? 2.I love your hair, it's black as tires....... 3.Should I buy you a beer now, or wait until after we fuck?? 4.Would you like to see my vasectomy scar? 5.Didn't we meet in a previous life? 6.Is that blood, or wine that your having? 7.Can I bum a clove? 8.Is that a rat on your shoulder, or are you just glad to see me? 9.Are you male or female??? (does it matter?) 10.I want to (krunk) you like an animal.... 11.Are those [nails/piercings/fangs] real or are they fake? 12.Do you have anything *else* pierced??? (slutty inflection) 13.Once you go black, you never come back... Abstract Blue wernberg at sciborg.uwaterloo.ca 1.'Do you want to see my stone collection' (it is a variant of the stamp collection' Belive me or not, it is still working. If you don't have any stones, then use your skulls, SM-equipment, eyeliners, poems or Sandman trade card (yuk)) 2.After I had been travelling for a while, I came to a city after a long drive. I was dirty, unshaved and tired... I parked the car, walked around a corner and saw a girl. I said something like: 'I am lost here, will you help me out' and she did :) Lauren Goodlad lgoodlad at u.washington.edu 1."Why don't we go somewhere where you and I can talk?" * 2."I think you should take me somewhere"* 3."I'm really sorry for staring at you. But I just got back from the Bahamas..."* 4."You must all be sisters, right?"*
Note: I'm not the author, these tidbits were all forwarded to me via
email. Where I know the author, it is given.
The "I work for a big public company" disclaimer:
The views expressed on these pages are mine alone and not those of my employer. I am not now, nor have I ever been employed to speak for anyone. Well, except my own company, but that's gone now. For more information, see the Standard Disclaimer